I went to the bookstore yesterday and had to buy the latest issues of Knit.1 and Interweave Knits. There are several projects I want to do in both magazines.
I’m still a bit mad about something that happened at the bookstore, so I’m going to write it down here and not think about it anymore.
There is a Thomas the Train play table in the childrens book section where kids can play. There are lots of trains to play with. Every kid had several train cars and there were several on the table not being played with. I was sitting right next to the kids while they were playing.
This woman dropped off her daughter and went not too far to look for books. The kids played quietly for a few minutes until she came back. Her daughter tattled on my son for not sharing a coal hopper train piece to her mother. I was surprised, because I was right there and hadn’t heard anything about it. So her mom asks her if she had asked the little boy to share. She asked Vaughan nicely if she could have the train she wanted, and Vaughan just as nicely said no you can’t I’m playing with it. In my mind, that should have been the end of it. But this other mother says to her daughter, don’t worry about that boy, he doesn’t know how to share because he’s a bad boy.
I said Excuse me! Do not call my child bad, there are lots of trains to play with and he doesn’t have to share the ones he’s playing with right now.
She said, But he won’t share! I looked over and counted 4 or 5 train cars not being played with. I said again that there are lots of trains for everyone and she doesn’t need the one my son had. This woman looked incredulous that I wouldn’t back her up, then scooped up her daughter into her shopping cart and started saying ‘We need to go now because that boy doesn’t know how to play nice and we don’t want to play with bad boys’.Her daughter bursts out crying because she still wants to play.
All the while my son is looking up at me to see if he’s in trouble. I tell him it’s ok, and tell her again not to call my son bad, he hadn’t done anything wrong. Chris came back from looking at his books, and I mouthed to him that we need to go NOW.
I really feel that I was not in the wrong here. If my son had ALL the toys, of course I would have told him to share. But her version of sharing was to just give up whatever you have if someone asks for it, even if it puts you out.
I just could not believe she had the gall to call someone else’s child bad in front of the child in question and the mother. I bet she wouldn’t have done it if I looked like I was closer to her age. I look a little younger than I am.
So that was our trip to the mall. Besides that last part we all had fun. And I got knitting patterns!
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Go you! Your son is in a massive minority of kids who know their parents will protect them from unfairness where possible. Lucky him!
It makes me crrrrrrrrrazy to hear parents teaching their kids things like this, as well as the whole if your kid hurts someone an across the board “say your sorry and make them feel better” makes me pretty wild too. Take the extra time to teach your kid to THINK about the consequences of their actions and teach them how to figure out if they ARE sorry, and teach them to think about the fact that “sorry” comes with an intent to not do it again. Good Parenting ain’t easy and its not for the weak minded/willed or lazy, thats for sure.
I has a really bad experience with my DD when she was about 1.5 at the “train table”; I almost broke down in tears I was so angry. My little one is very affectionate and was playing while older kids were there. She went to touch or hug another child and the child pushed her on the floor with the mother looking on. My DD looked up at me so sad and the woman said “you should teach your child not to touch other kids”…..What….you’re kidding right…she was 1 and a half…..people never cease to amaze me with their ignorance. That experience was so vivid for me and hurtful.
I must agree! My Mum, my little guy & I were at that same table (though different store location) and when we arrived, there were two mothers sitting and reading while their two children hoarded ALL the trains. I left my Mum watching my son so I could pick something up and when I returned, and we left, my Mum told me that not ONCE did either mother suggest their children share the trains with my son. It’s really unbelievable what some parents are teaching their children. Fortunately (or maybe it’s that it’s what I’ve TAUGHT him) my son is easy going and happy to share, otherwise this could’ve been really messy.